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Monday, March 01, 2004
the warriorgirl breathes eucalyptus and reposes Jan - Mar 2004
Friday December 26, - Monterosa, NSW
I don't remember the last time the Cicadas were so loud. They're almost screaming in my ears. I think it's been around 10 years. We've had a drought and they don't like to be around us in the drought. This year we've had good rain, so it's Cicada time again. Did you know they actually pee on you? When I was a kid i made up a song, singing "Cicada pee germ, cicada pee germ..." over and over again, as I ran through the fields under the trees getting peed on in the summer. It wasn't that bad (I see your faces grimace.) We'd just jump into the river after. No biggie.
It's really, really nice to be home. I'm exhausted. I've travelled the United States 3 times in 2003 alone, and seen every state except Oklahoma and Kentucky and probably a couple more. But I've seen and travelled a lot.
It's time for reflection, family, health, sunshine, and nature. The house looks fantastic. I love Monterosa. There are so many trees and cute animals (we have possums and little wren birds that come into the house.), and the weather, although hot, is magic. The isolation of where we live is welcoming at this time in my life. I need breathing space.
On Christmas morning I got up early and went for a run. I love running in the bush. I hear the birds, the black cockatoos, and the kookaburras (laughing like monkeys), and the rustling of the bushes as animals hide. It's crisp. The air is clean. The water is fresh. I feel rejuvenated already. By lunch time my mum, dad and i were really getting into silly season mood. mum bought a box of wigs and some theatre costumes at a garage sale, so we all got silly and dressed up!
Xmas with my folks is the best gift a girl could ask for. We opened gifts and I showed the Eric Idle tour video (the behind the scenes one which is a total blast to watch.)
Without unpacking totally, we drove down to Club Tac, our other house on the river and lake near Wyong, to spend the holiday season by the water. Way to hot to be out in the bush. They bought a new car, a little 4WD Ferosa that the roof comes off. It rocks. I drove it down. I hadn't driven in 3 months! And this time on the left hand side of the road.
I talked to myself the whole drive, "left side is good... left side is good... left side is good."
Tacoma is cool, and a summer heaven. We have a new loft above the garage with a superb view of the river, and it is perfect for my time here, to relax and get back in balance. The cicadas are still loud and I have two pet frogs outside who ribbet at night. A girl and a boy. How cute. I'm truly at peace.
Saturday December 27, 2003 - Club Tac, N.S.W, Australia
When I was considerably younger, I was inspired by our neighbour Bill, who seemed to consummately be creative all day long, every day, all year. He would design his days methodically, compartmentalizing his creativity in time segments. For example, mornings were music, some piano, maybe flute, then some art, by lunch he's writing his book, afternoon building parts of the house, back to some printing, more music, and it's dinner, and so forth. I always wanted to be like Bill. To be constantly creative. To be busy in my artistry from dawn to dusk. I would feel a sense of accomplishment if i could be like that.
Living overseas in Los Angeles has been the perfect conduit for my creativity, to expand my compartmentalization on a bigger scale and be constantly creative, constantly busy. With my goals intact, I have successfully designed my life to be one perpetual busy creative life, with my home office buzzing with inventory and stock for CDs, books, flyers, posters, other artists' products and Warrior Girl Music and Songsalive! affairs. 2 sometimes 3 computers going at the same time, phone calls in and out and touring and promotional work on a constant basis. My paintings hang the walls, and I can create music daily if I want to. I am project driven, and have many going simultaneously. Just back from a 3 month tour, and 2 tours before that just this past year, I've seen the country, built my company, shared my artistry and have a new album in the pipeline.
I could say that I succeeded in what I always saw and wanted in my neighbour Bill. Perpetually being creative. I remember people asking me, "Gilli, what is your ambition? What do you want?"
And I remember responding, "I want to be constantly creative."
Well, here I am. Constantly creative. I have learnt that creativity is innate. That, in fact, we are all constantly creative. So where does that put me? If i was already constantly creative, what I have created for my life now? Busy-ness? A pretence of successful creativity that requires immense fortitude and the ability to answer 300 emails a day and deal with the business more so than artistry. Being an entrepreneur is an interesting beast, but it doesn't give you solitude.
I run an organization, albeit with a strong team too, that requires daily attention. Currently it's tax issues, to be able to operate on a non-profit level. Mostly it's dealing with artists and songwriters constantly seeking advice, counsel, opportunities, gigs, ... their ambitions fulfilled.
And what about my ambitions? Do any of these artists truly care about what I want? Or how much time in the day I have for myself? Do they even ask these questions in their own circle of life around themselves?
I search for peace. To get off this "constant" spin. I yearn for wide open beaches, surf and sunshine, because that calms me. I don't want life to be hectic. I am now no longer wanting a compartmentalized day filled with busy-ness. I search for simplicity. Less.
Notwithstanding, with all intentions of goals attained, passions fulfilled and ambitions realized, I am still on my spiritual and creative journey. And I'm proud of what I've established, on far off soils. The challenges I've faced have made me stronger and taught me so much.
But surely there's an easier way, no? Am I to constantly be moving? Perpetually chasing, jumping, pole-vaulting?
How much of this business of creativity to I have to constantly control and battle in order to just be creative? I wrote a book about this question, and yet, here I am considering my options. Serious decisions. Weighing up my best course of action. Wondering if there is another way. There must be. For I am exhausted. The warrior girl has been to battle and come home very weary this time.
Being back home, going back to my roots, is very important. I hope that many do that on a constant basis. It's important to go back to one's roots, to find the answers, to remember who we are and where we came from.
I know that my personality craves creativity, and projects. I'm a project driven person. So stopping is just not in my psyche. Even as i sit here, in the loft at Club Tac (the affectionate name for our place on the river at South Tacoma ~ who needs Club Med when you have Club Tac ;) - I am still doing things. I'm tying up end of year loose ends in paperwork and emailing people. I don't think I can ever stop.
But my spirit requires definite stillness. I am doing this. The candle is lit, the incense on, the quartz and amethyst close by. Books by Newman and Berkowitz "How to Be Awake and Alive" and Fortgang's "Living Your Best Life" sit next to me, quelling my anxieties and constant desires to move. These books will still me. Reading is one of God's best medicines. Writing is too.
I remember in November 1999, when i was awaiting to go into hospital for major surgery on my ovaries (i had a football sized dermoid cyst on my right ovary and it was removed), I had gone through such spiritual stillness then too. I began to write my book "I AM A Professional Artist" then, and during recovery. This book has propelled me into experiences and journeys I never imagined for myself. I've travelled the country talking at seminars and music conferences, inspired hundreds of artists in my writings and beliefs, beliefs we all know but need to be reminded about. I've really enjoyed this new path as an author.
My aunt asked me at Xmas lunch yesterday, "Gilli, what does your tag line under your emails mean?"
"Revolution never happens suddenly on a global scale.
Revolution happens on the streets. It's time to unleash the warrior within"
I think she thinks I'm a communist or something. Or that I like war. I like neither. I don't agree with war, nor organized politics, nor organized religion. I'm a spiritual student, a renaissance believer, a one woman thinker and idealist in a world of peace and harmony, without organizations controlling us. We, as artists, are nomads, dictating our own philosophies, religion and way of life. It's my belief that because we are such free spirits, that no organization should control us or our art. So, for the music industry, it can only burn and die if controlled by non-artists who only want to make money off the art, who just want control over copyright and tangible objects. But art is not tangible. It's a philosophy, expressed through 2D and 3D matter, but it only lives through it an beyond. Art, its message, does not remain only on that object as finite. It continues through and onto the next artwork, the artist breathing his or her way of seeing constantly through everything they touch, infinitely.
I keep seeing ideologies and perceptions about my view of life through my art. In college, from 1988 - 1991, I was obsessed with the ideology of the mask, as were Carl Jung, and Rembrandt. The dark, the light on the face, the personalities we exude through the various masks we wear. I designed a huge, 10 x 10foot camera box one looks in to, and exhibited self-portrait photos in various guises, 2 mirrors and and 2 tv screens playing my first music video called Shadows. All about expression, the mask, the personalities we express. A thesis 300 pages long. I was 2nd in the year in art school that year.
My name, gillimoon was all about choosing a mask. The moon is a mask. It represents personality, it controls women's cycles. It became meaningful to me. Then along came "temperamental angel". My sophomore album that launched my artistry in the States. It's all about masks. Personality. Communication.
I've learnt a lot about communication with my tour with Eric Idle. Handling crew and living with a troupe of 11 for 3 months has been challenging. I've had to hold my tongue, use my tongue wisely, listen and learn.
Creativity, always, has been my guiding light, and at times, my darkest nemesis, constantly begging me for attention, for it's quiet insistence to pursue, do, excel. I sometimes feel like i am a slave to my creativity. Other times, i seek it for counsel, for understanding.
Even my website has been an amazing outlet for creativity. I think it feeds me more than it feeds others. I am able to unleash my thoughts through my diary and my philosophies through my writing/prose page. My artwork can be exhibited. I even brainstorm my albums and music simply by adding them to my site. My projectz page already has the seed for my next creation, and i haven't even started. It's as if by merely writing it down, and promoting it on my website, that i can begin new projects. It fuels me, guides me, whips me to go forth, to carry out the idea, and realize it. I have created my own mentor: my website becomes a mask of me, my teacher, pushing me forth into uncommon grounds.
Being home is solace. I've taken that ghastly watch off that i had to wear for the Tour, and i'm writing a lot. Not all here mind you. Some things aren't meant to be broadcast, if you know what i mean. I have demons to purge in my head and writing it down helps. I'm reading too. Thoughts, books, ideas. I'm designing my extraordinary life, piece by piece. I know this month will be important for anything that i may do, or be in the future.
Monday December 29, 2003 - Club Tac
I feel very much at peace in the loft at South Tacoma. For one thing I enjoy the breeze and the view it has of the water, plus the jungle feeling around it. For another, it's clean and is not smoky. My parents smoke and although I've never had a problem with it, it's nice to have a little bit of fresh air now and then, especially right now as i still have my cold i got in las vegas. My parents have built the most magnificent loft above the garage, and I'm fortunate enough to be able to stay in it while I'm here. I have my candles out, incense, and my music books. The task for January is to select the songs for the album, work on them, and start sending them back for production in San Jose which will be one spot I'll be doing the songs.
The cicadas are in full force and I'm waiting for the sun to full shine. It's been a bit overcast here, but that has been nice too. Here is our website for South Tacoma. It has some great pics of the house and the river. We rent it out as a holiday rental. Anyone interested?
I worked on Deborah Bishop's website yesterday. She is an artist semi-signed to Warrior Girl Music and we will be launching her album "just my alibi" in the new year. It's an interesting journey of mine to become a consultant in artist development. Whilst I'm still developing as an artist myself, i've taken on various artists under my wings, and beside me walking the path together, (for we learn as much as we teach). I enjoy being able to inspire artists and give them opportunities and advice that they may need. I created Songsalive! for that very reason... to give back to artists and the industry. It must all go around in cycles, giving, taking, sharing, learning. I'm blessed to be part of this cycle.
But right now, as I listen to the birds sing for their morning supper, and the sun tries to fight through the clouds, I must relax. It's time to be still, to listen to my heart, and remedy my weary bones with salt water and sunshine. As much as I have done so much, I also need to stop for a moment and truly listen to what my heart is telling me, otherwise I will wear out, and no one wants the warrior girl to do that.
So, I bid my readers adieu just for today, and I'm going off to be me, just Gillian Aliotti, and get back to my roots where my dreams were first planted a long time ago. gilli moon will surface again soon
Meanwhile, check out some new performance pics, latest buzz, some cool articles, and our wonderful shoppe.
Happy new year everyone!
Thursday January 29, 2004 - somewhere by the river in Australia
As i sit alone, after midnight, this is where my lyrics from my song Evolution work really well..
"I'm a riot.. in my own living room
and i'm not so good at communication
better silent as my own golden rule
i just don't fit in to evolution"
Mind you, I sing it with a lot of humor and laughter. I'm sitting in the loft at 2am having spent a month so far in australia being rather silent for a warrior girl and immensely enjoying my time out.
i'm noticing being home in aus that i have to force myself to take a break, to sit back by the water. i feel guilty in my pleasures. or sometimes my head yearns to busy itself with constant projects. i dunno. but what i do know is that rest is a great remedy and with my rest i also get energy to jump right back in it. so that's great.
2004 starts slow for me with some gigs down-under but nothing demanding. then i head to nashville for a great recording session 5 march to sing on Jeff Young and Badi Assad's "Liquid Voices" song for Jeff's new album. Such a pleasure to be flown to Nashville to record. After that it will be time to settle into L.A for a bit and record the new album.
Monday March 1, 2004 - life in the bush
The river is still. And so is my heart. I'm at peace. I have 2 more days down-under before I begin my year. Yes, you have all started. But i took my time, this time.
I have been around Sydney, up to Byron Bay, in land to Wollombi, and still,... by the river... at South Tacoma. I've had time to write songs, collect my thoughts, compose my new album, prepare for a year of FFLCE. If you're curious about this, email me and I might let you in on my new year's resolution.
By Friday I will be in Nashville, recording for Jeff Young and his new album of eclectic gypsy/flamenco/brazilian and contemporary rhythms. www.jeffyoung.ws. I will also talk at the Songwriters Guild next week in Nashville, then back to Los Angeles to settle in for a few months of recording, performing, songwriting and living an extraordinary life. See you there!
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